i’m 33. i spent 20 years drinking. numbing. not knowing. forgetting. i spent 20 years loving a poison.
i built an alter to my choice. to be sober. i build an alter to me. '
day 15. i feel anger continue to separate in-from me. fat raises to the surface of raw milk.
day 16. i know the anger is not me. it is the poison.
day 17. i miss the numbing. its ease. a thick blanket to pull over my head. too much. feeling
you stole an infinity of moments from me. you tricked me into loving-needing you and nothing else will do. you convinced me of the others hate reflecting off the mirror we hid behind,
alone, invisible, and safe,
from responsibility.
opportunity.
dignity.
each moment, an infinity, awaits my sobriety.